I like writing lists =)

It has been brought to my attention that Daniel, both Emma's (yes, BOTH Emma's), and potentially many more of my deprived Dent friends have not eaten pho before.  PHO!!!  A few things struck me in quick succession:

1. What are they doing with their lives?!
2. I haven't had a good bowl of pho in ages; I'm really craving some pho now =(
3. No, really, what the heck have they wasted 18 years of their life doing which has kept them apart from eating pho, one of the most glorious yet stunningly simplistic cuisines of all time?

But I'm no hypocrite; there must be a tonne of things I've yet to have or experience. With holidays fast approaching, there are a couple I'd like to do before they end, like:

• Having a week long marathon of movie marathons.  Oooooo, I'm gonna get very le fat.  
• Cook a banquet.  Probably will need that food for the movie marathons.
• Master the speedball.  
• Beat Chi in a game of pool.  Like actually beat him, not beat him by luck.  Okay fine, that's not gonna happen.  But a man can dream.
• Eat a kebab, pad thai, pho and a roast for breakfast, lunch, arvo tea and dinner.
• Actually be part of the winning team in Articulate.  Wow, I'm so bad at the game.  
• Pull something Sarbin-esque.  For example, read all of Sherwood in one sitting.  The only thing which matches the epicness of its sadness is its EPIC DIFFICULTY.  Mind over matter, babe.

And I reckon those are plausible.  Gonna have a boardgames arvo soon, allowing me to hone my Articulate skills.  Then, a movie marathon easily extends from that.  I can do the four epic meals in one day when I visit Usyd.  As for the speedball and beating Chi at pool, that may take a little longer...lol.  That looks like a good list, except for the last point: Shotgun NOT. 

For those who are not acquainted with Sarbin, trust me, you will know him one way or another.  He has many aliases.  Allow me to outline a small portion of his known exploits in the sporting arena:

• Sarbin created the 5 point play; he still gets the ball in when fouled during his free throw attempts.
• No one has ever scored a point against Sarbin in basketball.  And when Sarbin blocks a shot (which is always), he scores a 3 pointer.
• Sarbin beat the Lakers 1 on 5.
• Though Sarbin was selected to play in the NBA, English Premier League and the World Series simultaneously (as his own team), he declined the offers to be a lecturer in the Adelaide BDS course. 
• Sarbin throws the ball to himself to score a touchdown.
• The Super Bowl has been recently renamed the Sarbin Bowl, in his honour.
• Sarbin takes out 7 wickets in an over.
• Sarbin has bowled out the 12th man.
• Sarbin runs out three batsman in his first ball.  
• You can't play pool against Sarbin; the game ends after the break.  
• When Sarbin picks a pocket for the 8-ball, he picks a pocket on a different table.  In a different building.  In China.  Just for funsies.  And 'cos he can.  
• Sarbin beat Usain Bolt; you just didn't see him.  He was giving his victory speech to the press before the gun had sounded.
• To conclude this section, Sarbin is an intimidating man.  Beware: Sarbin has counted to infinity; three times.   

Saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarbin bro.  Saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarbin.

Hurray for writing lists!

Anyway, I best be off.  More lectures to catch up on.  Two more days 'till holidays!

Josh

What is a gay, hungry cell? A Phagosome. What's a phagosome crossed with a zygote? A Faggot.

NEWS FLASH: HUNGRY LADY STRIKES AGAIN!

Yes, my histology lecturer is a very hungry lady.  Very hungry.  Okay, simple squamous cells do resemble fried eggs, so I'll let that one slide.  But honestly, cuboidal cells don't look like apricots (it's called frigging CUB(E)-oidal cells for a reason) and columnar cells do NOT look like squashed avocados.  Squashed avocados?!  What the heck is she smoking?  Clearly something very strong, and not from Amsterdam.  Even if we excuse the fact that the lecture is held in the crappy Masonic Lodge (which has chairs but no table thingys), and forgive the lecturer's boring drone of a voice, she still deserves a slap on the face for making illogical and excessive food imagery when it's 12:30pm and we're all super hungry. 

There are some real characters in dentistry.  There's Fady, the guy who was deadly afraid of sexually harrassing a girl if he were to become drunk.  Then there's this Leo kid, short and stout (here is my handle, here is my spout), who decided to make enemies before the course even began.  With a MASSIVE BLACK GUY who could probably DESTROY him with his THUMB (via a thumb war preferably).  He either has a can of Mother surgically attached to his left hand, or he buys a heck of a lot of Mother.  I'm vouching for the surgical explanation.  Also, I hear he's nocturnal; he only sleeps two hours, and that's in the evening.  Yeah, he's pretty messed up in the face.  Then there's Sarbin.  SARBIN!  Don't get me started on Sarbin. 

Anyway, I've just gotta hack one more week with hungry hungry hippo lady (no, she's not actually hippo like in size or character = <), then it's Mid-sem break woooooooo.  That deserves a bigger woo: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!! Can't wait!  I'm pumped to play a game I call Conquerer Chicken: The Squatter Edition.  It's quite a self-explanatory game, sorta kinda.

However, before I leave Adelaide, I may be getting my Jelly on.  Allow me to briefly explain.  Today, we went on an 'Amazing Race' styled competition thing held by Rosie's church.  The prize last year was $500.  So, during the past week, we've been talking about how we should spend the money should we win; we decided we'd spend it all on one edible item, and buy ludicrous amounts.  And, what the hell, we actually won!!!!!  WOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!  The prize this year was a $200 voucher from Coles.  So, apparently, I may be getting my Jelly on: Aeroplane style. 

Seriously, why have my recent posts been food-centric to some extent?  Can't fight the trend but.  I really can't wait to have some cheese cake back in Sydney.  Mmm, cheese cake...

Then again, speaking of Chi's, there's really only one Chi, and that's the Chi who travels across the lands.  And by his generosity, I am able to enjoy the beauty of Chi's cake.  Yet another one of his numerous contributions to humanity; and he still has time to play Pokemon to fulfil his own true calling.

Anywho, hope to see you guys back in Sydney, the land Chi calls home.  Well, 'home'.  He is a man on the move.  Less than a week to go!  The only potential thorn in my side is this jelly conundrum.  Must...not...eat...10000000000000000 gallons of jelly...Must...choose...life....

Seeya on the other side!

Josh

It's probably Angina. P.S. I'm not a doctor

I've said this many times before, but one more time won't hurt: Things are quite different in Adelaide.  To begin, the time is 4:18pm, a cool 30 minutes behind Sydney, and I'm quite okay with that.  Another thing is Adelaide people call power line poles 'Stobie poles', yet when I was thirsty after a lecture and asked where the nearest bubbler was, all I got from the Adelaidians were peculiar looks as they slowly backed away from me.  They don't know what the hell a bubbler is!  To mention another vocabulary divide: when I say 'That's slack', they don't get it.  They think I'm saying the guy is lazy.

Things are quite different in Adelaide.  But, I must admit, I'm having a good time here.

However, I may or may not be homesick.  I was walking back from uni, and saw a Holden wagon from the distance, and thought to myself: 'Wow...that could be our family car' (nevermind the fact that it is a whopping 1400km from Sydney to Adelaide).  I didn't bother to entertain this impractical hypothesis, 'cos I knew there was no way it was our car.  Okay, fine, maybe I did check the number plate, just in case.  Better safe than sorry.  Stupid wagon, with your stupid numberplate WGE527.  So maybe I'm a little homesick.  Should get one the med students to officially diagnose me.

Speaking of medical diagnoses, apparently the Med students have been focusing on the one heart condition, Angina, over the last few weeks, and this has become a running joke.  Some guy on the road has a cough: 'It's Angina'.  I get a cold last week: 'Bad luck, must be Angina'.  We're watching a war movie in Justin's room, and a guy get's shot in the heart: 'Angina, dayam'.  It will be a day to remember when they can diagnose Angina for someone who is actually suffering Angina, or has appropriate symptoms at least.  I'd buy them a cake.

Also, what's a super yummy cake?  Must get Vish to teach me to make this cake.  I must stop thinking about food when blogging.  Cos now I'm le hungry =(.

Some people in my course went on dent camp over the weekend. Not mentioning any names of the contributors, but they got Fady, a short, gimpy guy who unsettles me, quite epicly drunk.  Clearly not the brightest of chaps, being a first time drinker yet deciding to go shot for shot with Daniel, dishing out some untimely trash-talk 'This is too easy, you [a few choice vulgur words]', minutes before puking it all out.  Then, instead of taking a break, or having some water, he goes right back into the thick of it.

Some vulgar insults from other languages are quite inventive.  Today, Daniel told me of one Serbian insult, which translates to 'Go back into your father's penis'.  Crude, yes; super effective, you bet ya.

I know it's never good to end on vulgar words in any form of conversation, and blog posts are not exempt from this rule.  But I'm out of content to talk about = <.  And I can't even media dump, cos stupid youtube is blocked. 

Sigh.  Be nice to me, I'm still sick =(.  Yes, I'm talking to you, axe-wielding gentlemen in the leftmost aisle seat.  And why do you have an axe?  It doesn't make any sense. 

I promise my next post will not so disappointing.  And hopefully, I'll have more vitality in my post as well.  lololol.

Seeya!

Josh

He has an ab

I stumbled across this and thought this made for interesting reading. Author: Chris Fung, aka Fung.

"I have an ab

I know this is true because I found it hurting one day while I was doing situps.

More than this, my ab, by all appearances seems to be quite stupid, and a terrible conservationalist.

Here is a log of our conversation yesterday.

AB:

So err... OUCH ... jeez.. I'm not sure really how to say this but, FUCK LOOK CAN YOU STOP THAT FOR JUST ONE SECOND. .... [beat] ouch.... look just talk to me for a sec... no don't OW... okayokayokay we don't have to talk, just stop for a second so I can think. FUCK WHY WON"T YOU STOP.

Okay fine, we aren't going to stop, and it's clear you don't want to talk .... fine. whatever. just tell me one thing.

WHY IN THE NAME OF ALL THAT IS HOLY AND GOOD AND A CAUSE FOR DELIGHT IN THIS UNREMITTING HELL OF OURS, WHY

WHY ARE WE TRYING TO DO 3000 SITUPS?

I DONT UNDERSTAND IT

DO YOU ENJOY MY PAIN?

AFTER ALL THESE YEARS OF COMPANIONABLE SILENCE, WHY DO YOU CHOOSE NOW TO HURT ME?

I THOUGHT WE HAD A GODDAMN UNDERSTANDING MAN. YOU EAT WHATEVER MEAT YOU WANT, AND I STAY OUT OF YOUR HAIR. OUT OF SIGHT OUT OF MIND.

AND NOW?

NOW YOU ACT LIKE I KILLED ONE OF YOUR FAMILY MEMBERS OR SOMETHING

IS THAT WHAT THIS IS?

IS IT? BECAUSE IF I DID, YOU TELL ME WHICH ONE IT WAS AND I'LL GO GET YOU A NEW ONE JUST LIKE IT ONLY TELL ME WHY YOU DO THIS.

[beat]

.... oh wow... thank you for stopping.

i knew that you were reasonaWHATTHEFUCK WHY ARE YOU STARTING AGAIN WHY WONT YOU JUST TALK TO ME

IT FEELS LIKE A LARGE TONGAN MAN IS DROPPING A MEDICINE BALL ON MY FACE AS WELL.


[pause]

oh my dear lord. WHY IS THERE A GODDAMN TONGAN MAN DROPPING A MEDICINE BALL ON MY FACE. im not even going to ask you to stop ANYMORE I JUST WANT TO KNOW WHY.

WHAT HEINOUS CRIME AGAINST LIFE HAVE I COMMITTED TO DESERVE THIS PROMETHEAN TORMENT. PLEASE MERCIFUL LORD JUST TELL ME WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYyyyyyyyyy

[end transcript]

and so on and so forth.


you know, despite the miracle of having an AB who can speak apparently without the physical organs and such-like that are traditionally required to do so, it's quite depressing to know that your AB is stupid.

I mean, far be it from me to belittle any body part, but were I an ab capable of speech, I wouldn't be wasting my time talking about tongan men or family members or such (?!?) I'd be saying things like,

"Hey chrisfung, did you know that if Stomach got this specific mix of nutrients, that you would gain the ability to breathe a noxious gas that is capable either of rendering other humanoids unconscious, or into a laughing fit so strong that they are rendered incapable of thought for the remaining duration of their natural lives?"

but you know, you can't choose your family, or your muscle composition apparently, and I suppose I'm stuck with my stupid ab.

WHile we're on the topic (not really, but I need some way to segueway out of this mess I've found myself in) alot of you faithful readers might be wondering what has been keeping my good self away from your side/specialist medical appointment/cake-consuming

event, and to your query, good reader, I have the following to say.

If I have not seen you for a period of less than one month, sorry yo, new job, tell you more about it over a banana smoothie.

If I have not seen you for a period of one month to one year, then I regret to inform you that i have either:
stolen a vast quantity of your cash and am unsure of whether or not I am suspected/had sexual relations with a female that is directly related to you or a close personal friend/ while inebriated performed one or more bodily functions within a space that may have been your home/car/personal office/letterbox/ have been unable to see you for to do so would blind my heart with affection and distract me from my crucial tasks at current which I see as contributive to a BETTER LIFE.

Speaking of which; it is true that I am now a full-time employee of STARCITY. I am a poker dealer. It is also true that this year and the year after I am devoting to full-time BETTERING MY ABILITY TO GET INTO WAAPA.

What this means is, all of my efforts will be geared towards either getting money, using the money to better my understanding of dance, time spent on crafting a body that can rival the competitors that I saw last year at the final call-backs.

SO SAYING, I will leave you readers with this final thought.

Time spent wishing is time wasted, I am tired of wanting a better body and not making plans to do anything about it. I am going to write here a list of the things that I will do in the next 7 days. This list is going to be populated with the kind of things that if I continue and make a habit, cannot but contribute greatly to my physical goals.

But building habitual action is hard. So I'm just going to take it a week at a time. Starting with these next 7 days.

Here is my list.
4 x 90 minute dance classes with SYDNEYDANCECOMPANY
3000 SITUPS
1500 PUSHUPS
30KM RAN

If you share my hate of your own planmaking, but then making and ACCEPTING your own pansy ass excuses to not do the work that you actually want to, then I ENCOURAGE YOU, make a similiar list.

It doesn't have to be a month in the future.

Just 7 days.

What do you want to accomplish in the next 7 days?"

Royal Flash

What up, you messing with a dirty MOSH PIT!!

Mo came back from Comsoc Camp. Hectic time he had. But I'm not one to transfer anecdotes into blogs because my name is moshmo, not moshjosh.

Instead I will share a bit about my emotional dealings.

Recently, baby, I was down down down down down. But not down like Jay Sean. Down like sadbearman. I was granted a way out, up into the air, using the balloons, but with no disrespect to the ferocious polar bear, it's too constructed for me. Instead, a fan has inspired me to change my attitude. And you know how ceiling fans are, blades of fury, I'm sure the j in mosh (hey theres no j in mosh) can insert some dota move instead but. OH BLADESTORM, that's what it's called. Yes, bladestorm chucks me into the air. So end result: happiness is obtained only by what I believe and want. I knew that already. But I must look within me. And then, project outward to those who matter. Then it's all terrific.

Enough crap. Now, uni work. Hmm, falling into old habits of lack of sleep. Hmmmm. No worries, big study from now on. Ok, enough talk from the mo.

Quick shout out, artsy people who read this, can you get me essay tips, I have to write an anthropology essay for next week lol.

OH, just for josh, since he has forgotten what NRL looks like, I have been informed that the dragons powered over the eels with incredible tactics by Grand Master Wayne Bennett, and pinpoint awesome kicking by the Young Gun Jamie Soward. BREATHING EFFING FIRE PEOPLE.

So many strange people...

Another week of uni has passed, and I've come to realise that I've got some really strange lecturers in Dentistry.  Tuesday morning, 8am, we've got this elderly female lady who's been giving us a stream of lectures on 'What is health', and 'What makes us healthy'.  I was on the verge of falling asleep, until she started digging herself a hole by talking about a 'fit mouth' (in an attempt to compare oral health, to an aspect of general health - exercise and fitness), and in a state of confusion, I wrote down 'A fit mouth is...a functional mouth?!?!?  wth....' 

Not all the lecturers are strange and boring.  Some are merely strange and hungry.  Our physiology lecturer compared everything to food, in particular, confectionary: 'So here's a diagram of a cell.  As you can see, there are all these jellybeans, representing mitochondria, vesicles, peroxisomes...'.  Then, he moved on to 'Here's a lysosome.  Yes, it looks like a jellybaby'.  Didn't even call it quits after that: 'The peroxisome is about 1/3 to 1/2 the size of a lysosome.  You can see it here, the smaller red jellybaby.'  Since then, cells have never looked so edible.  The picture in his slide of a partial cross-section of a cell now seriously looks like a Gobstopper, where the nucleus is the hard spherical centre. 

The tutor we have is pretty stock-standard.  However, Dogs was telling us about his tutor, and she sounds AWESOME.  Hard to convey in words.  Apparently, she's got an asian accent and talks really really fast.  So, put on your best asian accent, and say it out loud really quickly after you read this: '-itis, -itis, what else ends with -itis?  Appendicitis.  Gingivitis.  Hepatitis.  What else ends with -itis?  What else ends with -itis? Endocarditis.  What else ends with itis? Three-thirty-itis.  ha-ha-ha-ha.'  LOL.  Dogs told us this in between two back to back lectures, so I was still stifling my laughter when the lecture was about to begin.  The lecturer (the hungry guy) then turned off the lights.  Then, the guy next to me turns to Arun (this big curry guy, cool guy), and says 'Hey Arun, where did you go? I can only see your teeth', which made this guy in front of us fully crack up laughing.  lololol super inappropriate much, I was cracking up every 5 seconds for the first 5-10 mins of the lecture as a result.  Also, it made me miss Nimalan.  If only it were as easy as turning the lights back on to see Nimalan again.

One more story, just to wrap up.  Lab finished early again this week.  We were stuck waiting around, so we started sharing stupid stories from back in highschool.  One of the stories Dogs shared was about a mate in his class who decided to write a story dissing his English teacher, who the class thought had an uncanny resemblence to a turtle.  Dogs was like 'you're an idiot, what if they find out it was you?', and the guy replied confidently 'Don't worry, I won't put my name on it, duh.'.  Not only did the guy format it in the exact same way he formatted everything he had previously handed in to that teacher (same borders and font), but he was the only person to fail to put his name on the document.  lololol.

Anyway, I'm out.  Lots of stuff happening, but lots unsuitable for blogging about, or gets increasingly lame if typed up.  Some of the stuff I just typed sounds lame; trust me, it was ultra funny at the time, just like ultra balls. 

Seeya around!

Josh

P.S. our college is holding a Pokemon Tournament.  Just goes to show that Pokemon is appreciated far and wide, even as far as Adelaide.  Who would've thought.  Now, I'm severely tempted to ask them if they know Chi, hopefully getting the reply 'CHIIIIII!  The guy who travels far and wide, ye?  Give him this, as a present from me.' [Josh just received a Master Ball!]  Then I would use the master ball to catch the girl of my dreams, and the world would be at peace once again.  lololol.

The Legend of Vish and Daniel

Okay, maybe the title is a little misleading.  It's more the legend of Vish, with a sprinkling of Daniel to provide cool comedy relief.  Now that you mentioned sprinkles, I'm feeling hungry.  Craving a chocolate muffin with sprinkles on it.

Which brings me to the middle of the story: Vish is a trained chef, and more importantly, could probably whip up a mean chocolate muffin with sprinkles.  But, that's the middle of the story, so I'll start at the beginning.

Yesterday started with the biggest waste of time laboratory in the history of mankind.  Wow, it was super wasted time.  I don't believe they actually forced us to say "We spread several species of spiteful bacteria while speaking, spitting , coughing and sneezing" ten times over.  Well, not really ten times, because I found myself eventually saying "Tool, tool tool tool, why are you such a tool." 

Anyway, the lab took us an anticlimactic 30 minutes to finish.  Most people decided to bail and go home; I just didn't feel like going back to college, so I just sat on the couches in the Basement.  And here, I ran into Daniel.  lol Daniel.  Good old Daniel.  Pretty much, Daniel's your typical tall French Adelaidian who says what's on the top of his head, and doesn't care what other people think.  Also, he plays HON.  lololol HON.

After Daniel got his Hep B booster shot all done, we returned to the Basement, where we ran into the man of the moment, Vish.  Vish is a 28 year old half Indian, half Irish guy.  And he's awesome.  I say this time and time again: people with life experience are the bomb.  In between dropping out of uni and becoming a chef, he travelled Europe, where he smoked weed in Amsterdam.  And when I say weed, of course I mean 'plants which grow where you don't want them to'.  I knoweth the Agriculture.  Anyway, Vish claims the weed there is high quality, and has minimal hallucinogenic side effects.  Well, aside from the seeing pot plants as soldiers and the ceiling as lava in a lava lamp.  His words, not mine.

Vish had already told me about his exploits as a chef some time last week.  But this was news to Daniel's girlfriend, Miranda.  By the way, Miranda is a top notch girl; we had extensive discussions about 'how to tell Japanese and Koreans apart from Chinese', which ended up with many racially charged and politically incorrect: PI observations.  She also concluded that I was very shallow in picking girls: "All you say 'this girl is pretty' and 'that girl is hot'" (this whole discussion came about 'cos I said 'Don't worry, I go for asian girls'.  How do I manage to dig myself such a big hole?).  Of course, I was prepared to defend myself, with a string of counter-arguments, but then I couldn't resist saying "That's hot".  In a chilli kind of way.  Chilli hot.  And now I'm back to my original problem: I'm kinda hungry =(.

Anyway, Miranda claims that the overused observation 'Food is the way to a man's heart' is overrated, but rather, 'Food is the way to a woman's heart'.  Once again, this gives me a new reason to learn to cook well; Vish has promised to teach me to cook one awesome main dish by the end of the 5 years.  It'll probably take me that long to learn it lol.  Miranda asked Vish what was the best dessert he could make, which prompted the unexpected reply: a Lemon Tart.  Apparently, it was a recipe he learnt as a chef at a highly acclaimed restaurant in Melbourne, and he swears it is delectable.

lol, then Daniel asked 'How much would it cost for you to cook at my 19th?'.  Vish paused, then said 'Depends what you want me to cook, and how many people it's for.  But, it would be a reasonably large sum', and left it at that.  lololol.  Now that's what I call authority.  No price quoting for you.

New mysteries about the man of Vish were also unravelled yesterday.  To begin, Vish plays pool pretty well.  He too wasted away his uni playing pool instead of going to lectures and studying.  lololol.  Also, he's played on the State futsal team as goal-keeper.  Man, makes me wanna play soccer again.

You know what, stuff it, I think I am gonna play indoor soccer!  And I'm going to get myself a muffin!  I'm sick of waiting around for my turn!

Okay, I lied.  I'm not going to get a muffin =(.  As for indoor soccer...

Well, the point is, Vish is truly (as Fung may put it) a mystery, wrapped in a puzzle, covered by secrets, enclosed in a question, and shrouded by more mysteries, and those mysteries can give birth to little baby mysteries have their own puzzles, secrets and questions, waiting to be solved, uncovered and answered respectively.  But alas, I am tired; the story of Vish must continue in a new blog entry on a new day, because this one is finished...

Not yet...



a little more...




just a little more...




almost there...




u made it!  And you wasted 2 seconds of your life in the process scrolling down.  lololol.

Josh

Some things are just not meant for blogs. Like this post.

I've learnt there are some things which one should not blog about.  For example, when I was walking to the ATM, accompanied by Graeme (cool Malaysian guy, very chilled and laid back) and James (cool Half-Chinese guy from Hong Kong, whose build matches his choice to do Physio at uni), Graeme said he was craving an 'Ab'.  Of course, I inquired into what these 'abs' were, hoping the answer did not involve cannibalism.  They used this term to describe what USyd people who know as a 'kebab on a plate' with chips.  In fact, 'ab' stood for 'abortion', in particular, the image of blood and the dead foetus and all the other junk; that's what they thought a kebab on a plate looked like.

See, that was a horrible image.  That's why some things were just not meant for blogs.   Contradictory much lololol.

Anyway, one good thing that has come about being in Adelaide is that today is a public holiday.  Good old South Australia, giving all the citizens here a day off to doll up, bet ludicrous amounts on horses and get so drunk they can't tell apart men from women (don't ask me, ask a doctor.  No, seriously, if you are that drunk, you really need to see a doctor, if you want your liver to remain inside of your body rather than in a bin). 

Oh dear, offending the South Australian government was also on the list of things which shouldn't be deal with on this blog.  Scrap that last bit.

Unfortunately, one more thing that seems to have deserted this blog are media links.  And it's totally not my fault.  This college has blocked all media from the net.  Well, that's what they told me.  I suspect Chi had a hand in this, just as a little reminder to me that yes, he has travelled across the lands, and yes, it is part of his qualifications to run to Adelaide, tell the staff to block all media access to my computer and run back to USyd, in time for his Maths lecture (which he wouldn't end up going to anyway; he'd just play pool).  Yes, that was in his CV.  You should see that thing.  It weighs a tonne of brick.  Or a tonne of feathers.  But bricks does sound more manly, and I bet it is a bit heavier.  lololol.

Some things were just not meant to be, I guess.  We'll just have to wait and see.

But I really really REALLY hate the waiting game. =(.

Josh

Oh babe, I don't have AIDS

It's kinda late, and I'm super tired.  However, I do feel compelled to post about the day that was, even if it will be by no means an extensive, intricate account.

In terms of lectures and labs, today was a great step forward in the right direction.  The lectures, for starters, only had a minimal technological hiccup, as opposed to the outrageous technology fail the previous day.  Yesterday, the lecture consisted of a whole lot of useless revision babble (45 minutes of revising the previous lecture is a bit too much...), then they tried to put on a video presentation on homeostasis, but technology said 'NO', and we ended up leaving the lecture, learning absolutely nothing.  However, I was able to chat to the girl next to me, who turned out to be pretty cool and chills; I won't disclose her name, lest the Mo-nster tracks her down, facebook style, and attack me with a flurry of questions.  And when I say Mo-nster, I obviously mean the Cookie Monster.  Nothing suss lololol.

Anyway, had lunch with a couple of guys.  On of them, Hyung, had just finished his compulsory national service in the Korean army.  He told us about his rigidly structured days, the ridiculous amount of marching and drills and shovelling.  Of course, one of the question raised was 'Why do they have compulsory service in Korea?'.  Lol, then Seung, the other Korean guy with us , replied with a stony expression 'Because...we have an enemy'.  lololol.  lololololol, so much lol.  We got more details about Hyung's army training.  As part of the artillery division, he told us he had been trained to wield a weapon bigger than a bazooka (much bigger in fact), which was used to hit targets 50km away.  Again, we asked 'How did you practice and learn to use that?', which Seung replied, with that same stony gaze 'Aim North and fire'.  lolololololol.  The war between South and North Korea never ceases to amaze me.

I found out a guy in my lab group was gay.  Of course, I felt bad for him.  Not 'cos he was gay, of course; that would just be super discriminatory.  Rather, 'cos I had been saying 'gay', 'so gay', and 'aw that's just gaybar' at quite a high frequency during the lab session.  Hope he wasn't too offended...

Anyway, at the end of the day, I had to get my blood test results from the University Health clinic.  The uni forced us to do a blood test the previous week to check if we had Hep B and C, AIDS, and sufficiently high Hep B antibodies.  Unfortunately, the medical centre I went to do the test (in NSW, and asked them to mail my result to the Adelaide clinic) epic failed and didn't mail it.  So I was stuck waiting around for a little over an hour to fix up the problem.  However, it was all worth it because now I can quell all the crude and horrible rumours: I do not have AIDS.  Let it be know to man, boy and child alike.  I also do not have Hep B or C lol.  That's also a good thing.  Anyway, that hold-up at the clinic was a little problematic, since I had to get back to my college before 5:30pm to get dinner. As a result, I knew what had to be done: the super 15 minute walking challenge.  Gogo legs!  It's actually all about luck, being able to catch the green lights on pedestrian crossings.  It goes to show that Everest like challenges are presented to you every day, and you better be ready to be walking so fast during that 15 minute walking challenge that you can excavate a tunnel right through that mountain and show it who's boss, without breaking your stride.  But, success comes at a heavy price; I'm now tired.

Talking with Sean (3rd year dent student) at dinner today.  Again, he was forcefully encouraging me to go to the Basement Party this Friday (The dent student association refurbished the basement of the Dental Hospital as a general meeting ground as well as use for parties etc).  One of the things he mentioned was 'free drinks and pizza'.  Another moment to disillusion our readers: no, I do not have a massive beer gut.  In fact, I don't drink.  But, I must admit, the pizza was appealing.  I knew I was in dangerous territory, and to convince myself this new discovery was not all that it was cracked up to be, I retorted 'Yeah, free pizza!  Sounds good!'  Frick, I couldn't even force words out of my mouth to talk badly of free pizza.  It's free pizza!  Luckily, Sean replied 'Haha, you'll see fat people dancing with pizza in one hand and beer in another, while singing "I like to move it move it, I like to move it move it"'.  How...attractive...lololol.

Anyway, I best be off.  Bye!

Josh

P.S. Shotgun not editing this.  I'm le tired.

Can't sleep...Clown will eat me...=(

The title of this post, contrary to popular belief, is not a superfluous one.  In fact, I did struggle to sleep last night.  Furthermore, we all must be weary of clowns: their mega creepy makeup, their extremely flammable red noses and the giant shoes they walk around in (which I presume are for stepping on people; small people in particular).

Anyway, I'm having a little trouble sleeping at night.  It's not my fault at all however.  It's not even my body's fault, or my mind's fault.  It's just been an unfortunate arrangement of events which has interrupted quite rudely, consisting of unexpected travels across states (Chi's face was smiling down on me), and attended my cousins wedding down in Melbourne.  Also, I have an irrational fear of clowns, and their seemingless endless potential to attack me in my sleep.

But yes, good news: I'm in Adelaide!  Second bit of good news: I survived my first day at uni!  Things have gone quite smoothly.  I've gotten to know a surprising number of people on college.  It all came together when one guy, J Lee (His name is Josh; we agreed it was way too weird to call the other 'Josh', so he now calls me Yao, 'cos apparently in his opinion, that's who I look like.  Shocked and amazed) extended his hand out, decided to be a good guy, and invited me to play pool with him.  Reminds me of Ajey...bringing people together; now I miss USyd.  Sad panda.  Anyway, this morning, we decided to walk to uni together, 'cos I said it would help me get my bearings and familiarise myself with Adelaide.  He agreed, and said it was like marking territory for a dog, besides the peeing on the ground bit.  I almost interjected with 'Besides peeing on the ground?  Maybe for you, my friend', but I quickly swallowed my words.  The aim is not to freak people out.  I get jokes.

Through J Lee, I've gotten to know some 1st year Med students, and a few dent students in grades above, all who are pretty awesome people.

I should really wrap up this post.  I've actually got homework.  If you just fell of your chair in shock, I'll waste this sentence so you can pick yourself up, have time to say 'No way, hose' out loud and spit on the ground in disgust.  Shocked and amazed.  I am truly shocked and amazed.

Anyway, I should end this post with 'Ten things I hate about you', where you is not you, the reader, but rather the city which is Adelaide:

1. It's not Sydney, and it certainly isn't home
2. I'm away from my dear family and friends
3. The water sucks.  It really really sucks.  Gatorade's better.
4. Adelaide is an unjust city; I'm beginning to suspect communist puppet-mastery.  Some security guard fined a college buddy of mine, 3rd year dent student, for parking in a spot he has parked in for the last 2 years.  
5. The room doesn't provide coat hangers
6. The uni is small
7. There are no markedly attractive girls.  Okay, admittedly, there is this one girl in dent...maybe I should take that one back
8. OMGOSH EVERYONE PLAYS AND WATCHES AFL.  THERE WAS A SIGN IN THE COLLEGE WALL ADVERTISING A NETBALL AND 'FOOTY' COMPETITION, WHICH GOT ME EXCITED, BUT THEN VERY LET DOWN COS THEY WERE TALKING ABOUT AFL.  YOU CAN'T SAY 'I GO FOR THE DOGGIES' (which I don't), COS THEY THINK YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT THE WESTERN BULLDOGS.  THEY SHOW NRL AT RIDICULOUSLY LATE TIMES IF EVER.  ALL THEY TALK ABOUT IS 'AFL' THIS AND 'AFL' THAT.  STOP SAYING AFL, THAT IS MAKING MO, THE ANGRY FULL-BEARDED LEBRACHAUN VERY ANGRY FOR STEALING HIS ACRONYM.  STUPID SOUTH AUSTRALIAN AND VICTORIAN PEOPLE. (If you read this and you're in my course/I know you and you come from SA or VIC, no offence lol.  I'm specifically talking to the other people...yeah...)
9. I'm probably gonna get converted into an AFL fanboy.  That's not good at all =(.
10. Well, number 10 has to be obvious.  I don't get to see the man of the moment.  Yes, you know who im talking about: Chi.

However, there are good things about Adelaide.  One being I'm making Chi proud for my travelling, even if he is too proud to show it.  Also, Michelle, a 1st year Med interstater from Melbourne (AFL even got Michelle.  So sad), says the water stops tasting funny, and she has only been there for a week.

It's a time for change, I guess, and the change is definitely worthwhile.  Let's just hope I can get better sleep tonight.

Josh