For those who fail at poker. Yes, I'm looking at you Chen

Okay, I've received a small amount of back lash for insulting Hong Kong.  Oh yes, paying tribute to our glorious leader, Mao.  Okay, all good, all done.  Hong Kong definitely has its pros.

1. Hong Kong has a great communist leader, Chairman Mao.  Put as number one 'cos Mao is number 1. 
2. The food.  It's asian, it's great, and it's ridiculously cheap.  Like wow, lunch costs $2 AUD?  What the gay?  But it's not so good if you don't know the general etiquette.  Yesterday, dad and I went to Yum Cha for lunch.  Two ladies also joined our (we were at a table for 4, there's no concept of personal space in Hong Kong restaurants).  So me and my dad have already ordered food and everything when they arrive.  First thing they do is put their cup, inside their bowl, and pour tea all over it.  And we were like what the gay?  what are you doing? Of course, I said it out loud in english.  Fortunately, my dad could translate it for me.  They told us that they pour hot water over the over the cutlery and bowls etc to clean it.  But they kept laughing at me for doing strange things e.g. eat off the plate, instead of out of the bowl.  But, after I heard about their cleaning procedures, the bowl seemed a bit suss, and the plate looked marginally cleaner =(.  
   
3. Transport.  I've heard rumours of how convenient it is.  It'll get you from point A to B faster than you can read this sentence.  I promise I'm telling the truth.
   
4. The locals.  Even though I'm essentially a freak of nature to them, they are still really really nice to me.  Then again, I dont exactly know what they are saying, but at least they are saying it with a smile on their face.  Or is that a smirk?  
5. Friends.  I just found out Kenny and Arthur are in Hong Kong!  Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I'm not alone, hurray.  That in itself makes Hong Kong at least 10 better.  Unfortunately, so Kenny would come grab me from the hotel, instead of me going to him, getting lost and insanity ensuing (as detailed in a previous post), I promised to name my third child in his honour =(.  But fortunately, due to Mao's one child policy, there shall be no third.  Hurray for the iron grip of communism.

Right now, loving Sting.  Listen and let it sooth your mind.  Also, the guitarist kinda looks like the Green Goblin from Spiderman.  Google tells me they are different people by the names Dominic Miller and Willem Dafoe.  I am not that easily convinced but.    



For those who are bad at poker,  pay careful attention to this song.  Have you ever thought whether the spades are the swords of a soldier?  Well...yeah!  You should.  Think about it.  I know I have. 

Relaxed enough?  Now lets ruin all that peace and tranquility and positive chi energy with a game of Super Mario Brothers!


Let's do this!  Let's do this!...You have to jump at the start??? lol and lol. 


Anyway, apparently, Kenny will be arriving shortly.  Awesome.  Now, if, perchance, a hot halfie comes our way, Kenny can translate and his soothing voice will woo her for me.  At least thats once of the Can'tonese problems out of the way.

Unfortunately, the moral of today's story is about Chi energy: Tasty on the lips, but adds to the hips.  That's why Chi has to travel across the lands to maintain his superb physique.

Have a nice day,

Josh

p.s. Regarding the post 'Taking the bridge to Wiseman's Ferry', here's my attempt to elaborate on Mo's post, 'cos if you understood that post, I would have to respectfully ask you to leave the building, you filthy liar.  Via the wonderful world of Bored Aussies, Jono and James firmly decided that the word 'dog' was insufficient to cover the degrees of dogness.  So we established a little system:

do1 = hardly dog, just a little pot-shot.  Or, when something slack happens to you, but it can't be pinpointed to a specific source.  Example: You're stuck in Mr Chandra Handa's 2 unit English class for year 11 and 12.  That's just do1.  Bad luck kiddo.  Unfortunately, that kiddo was me =(. 

do5 = dog.  just dog.  Example: Someone organises a gathering, like watching a movie, and you end up being the only one who turns up.  Now that's do5. 

do9 = maximum dogness.  Super duper dog.  One wouldn't even think before they say do1.  Do5 is a more charged with anger and spite.  But, before one declares do9-ness, one must consider the magnitude of the wrong done to them.  One may say someone is do4 ugly, but to say do9 ugly - even hardened criminals would be weary of commenting in such a vulgar way, lest they suffer a rasengan to the face.

Back to the explanation.  As a result:

60p = the inverse of do9.  completely not dog.  It's so un-dog, it's on the verge of being kind. 

Since 60p also equals 60 pence, add 39 pence and you get a microwaveable pizza.  And once again, the world marvels at Mo's propensity to see things in a retarded, and money-hungry way.  When the ads arrive, you'll understand what I mean...

Anyway, Jono and James may disagree with my interpretation of the dog scale, feel free to correct me.

p.p.s. For all those playing at home, you had better draw a card now, or suffer a double ping...