The Name of the Game is Schnapps...***

It has been brought to my attention that I have failed you.  I have failed you epically hard.  Regarding the previous post, I failed...to make a reference to our man of the moment, Matthew Chi.  Look up a dictionary, you'll see a picture of me, with the speech bubble 'I'm sowie, I failed.' 

I'm so sorry.  Time for a cheap laugh:


Notice what he says at the end: 'I didn't stop because of the policing worries'.  And, nor shall I worry about the policing worries either.  That made perfect sense, I promise.  So, time to make amends to Chi!

The name of the game is schnapps.  Can you keep up?  Hard one to follow... ***...***. Still with me?  *** Nearly forgot to do the clicks.  Leave it to me.  ****.  Very close to the end. **.  Listen closely...****. lols, all done! [*'s are clicks]


Oh wait, Chi doesn't know how to play schnapps.  What a rip.  Anyway, when you figure it out Chi, remember, I'm just a messenger, please don't hurt me =(.

Not much to say about the present today.  Just shopping and eating.  I saw two pretty girls driving in a porsche, and thought to myself 'Rich and pretty, what else could a man want'.  Reprimanding myself, I then thought 'Brains, a heart which isn't as hard as stone and cold as ice, and speaks English without sounding like a parakit', and proceeded to slap my face in self-disgust.  How do I keep failing to remember this?  Bad Josh, very bad Josh.

Anyway, Chi and Girra people are only half of the party.  Since 2009, I've updated my definition of 'Baulko people' (previously ugly fire-breathing, child-eating creatures), to a very normal and quite awesome tribe, who have the unfortunate habit of kidnapping children and feasting on their brains (you heard me, brains).  Don't judge them, they are only human like you and me.

• Ajey, formally Agey according to Chi.  lol, Ajey.  That's would be my generic greeting for Ajey; I don't exactly know why.  I think I just find it funny that I, the most unlucky of people (having -15 Luck points), was so fortunate to run into Ajey at uni.  He does the exact same course as me (who would have thought another person would choose something as ridiculous as Science/Law; however, he is enjoying the course, unlike a unnamed person =[, sadness), and he pretty much brought our entire group together. 
• Cass - Good old Cass.  Cass = storyteller.  We concluded that it would be impossible for me to repay the debt of stories I owe to her, considering the millions and billions she has told me.  Also has a 'healthy' rivalry with Joon in pool.  Well, if 'healthy' is defined as eating deep-friend food every meal for 6 meals a day (breakfast, morning tea, lunch, afternoon tea, dinner, supper), and you suck on a deep fried chicken as a dummy while you sleep, then yes, its very very healthy.  One more thing: she sees people in colours.  Apparently, I'm yellow; not racist at all, ey?
• Jess - lol Jess.  Mo showed her 'Can I have your number', and as a first reaction, told Mo it was not funny and super lame.  Oh, dayam girl.  Big mistake.  I made it super lame for her, by quoting lines from it pretty much every time I saw her.  lololol.  Oh, also, CHTATL, nothing more to say, other than not suss at all.  lol and lol.
• Sam (she's a girl) - didn't see Sam all that much this year, but when she was around, 'twas awesome.  I remember one time when we were playing pool in particular: I was retelling to Jess, Aimy and Chi the story of Fung's ramen challenge.  Ramen challenge is eating a retardedly massive bowl of ramen (weight of ramen is based on your weight, generally around 2kg of ramen) and the super salty soup in 60 minutes.  After telling it, Sam gave Jess a pensive look, and then said 'What a girl! [i.e. Fung is a girl, I thought it necessary to make that clear; should I reiterate?]  I think I could take that.'  That just made me massive LOL.  Good old Sam lol.  
• Viv - Viv!  My ACC church buddy, who I didn't get to know at ACC.  She's one of those ninja type who people who seem to be simply nice and sweet 'cos they aren't outspoken.  Don't get tricked; as a ninja, she also has the ability to roundhouse kick your butt if you're not careful.  All-round awesome person to be around, and knows how to play CS!  But Viv, why keep headshotting me =(.  Made me so sad. 

Anyway, thanks Baulko people!  You've made my year at least 5 more awesome, maybe 10 more awesome.  I will offer you a young Caucasian child as a peace offering.  I promise it's not the one I abducted from Hong Kong.  Not that I abducted a Caucasian child in Hong Kong.  Who do you think I am anyway?  Why am I on trial??

Anyway, quick story from the past.  Man, I hope that the people detailed in these stories can't sue me for defamation or some dodgy law dealio.  Don't do it, I beg you.

Year 10: Bin Licking Goodness.  I won’t dwell on this story.  Pretty much, Fatty dared VJ to lick the bin, with the presumption that no one in their right mind would take him up on the dare.  Possibly unwisely, he put a $10 wager on it, which may have incited VJ into doing it.  Furthermore, he failed give VJ a full-body physical to check if he had balls of steel.  This may or may not have lead to Fatty’s decision to undertake medicine, lest he suffer another loss of $10 to another steely-balled man.  After much discussion, VJ completed the task, licking the bin outside surface.  Fatty tried his best to back out; he claimed that wasn’t enough, and VJ in fact had to lick the inside of bin; VJ looked at him, then BAM, he licked the entire inside circumference of the bin.  Then lol, Fatty, realising his defeat, fobbed off a ripped $10 note, despite VJ’s amazing display of courage, mind-over-matter attitude and the profound ability to turn off one’s tastebuds to suppress the gag reflex.  I'm also surprised, yet happy, that VJ didn't get AIDS.

Okay, it's late.  Valentine's Day is coming up.  I think a certain someone should be thinking carefully about that.  And don't say 'Shame, Valentine's Day is on the same day as Chinese New Year.  Maybe next year, and I promise I'll be super romantic?'  I promise you will get a cosmic-sized slap on the face on every minute, of every hour, of every day, of 2010.  And that would be a testament to the kind-heartedness and mercy of the girl on the other end.  lol and lol.

Josh